Q & A – Which Last Name Should I Use?

QUESTION:

Hi there,

I’m wondering, for the wedding invite verbiage, what should my last name be? I’ve been using my married name from my previous name. Should I be using my maiden name on the invite or can I use my married name that I’ve used all these years?

Any help would be great.

Thanks,
Aviga

ANSWER:

Dear Aviga,

This is a question I have been asked often in the past couple of years with second marriages becoming more and more common. It’s a great question!

Etiquette doesn’t have an answer for this (sometimes it takes etiquette rules a long time to catch up with the current times). However, the answer is actually quit simple. You should use the last name your friends and family know you by. If that means that you use your first marriage last name, then so be it.

It would be odd for your friends to get a wedding invitation from someone with a last name they do not recognize. They may not even know it’s you if you use your maiden name!

If you are truly uncomfortable using your first marriage last name, then go ahead and use your maiden name. In the end, since etiquette can’t give us the black-and-white answer on this, you (and your fiancé) will have to make the final call. If it were me, though, I’d use the last name everyone already knows me by.

I hope this helps, and happy wedding planning!

~Eve-Maridy